Love

The thing that we always talk about.
The thing everyone wants so badly.

It is easy to find…depending on which variation knocks at your door. Many people promise to show it to you, not knowing that what they have to offer is a cheap knockoff. The scary thing is that you can take it and run with it, thinking that you’ve found the real deal. Many people settle for what knocks at their door because they think that it has to be the best offer on the table. That if they don’t take what is in front of them that another offer will never come. You stop questioning authenticity because you can’t bare the thought of being without it ever again.

This love…this love that forgets to put you first. This love that wrongs you but hands out apologies as frequently as it snows in South Africa. This love that doesn’t encourage your dreams but calls you stupid. This love that puts it’s homies before you. The sad thing about love these days is that it can change it’s mind. When it finds a better option, when it’s selfish needs are not met, when it’s insecurities get the better of it…it changes its mind.

It decides that the words it first used to get into your heart no longer ring true…but then again those could have been lies from the beginning. This love leaves bruises on your heart and then blames you for them. It doesn’t keep promises. And it always leaves you wondering if you’ll ever be enough. The sad thing is that deep down inside you know that you don’t deserve this treatment but you stay…because better the devil you know, right?

This love has stripped you of your confidence so much so that you don’t have kind words to say towards yourself. Always pointing out what needs to be fixed, wanting to nip and tuck the ugly away but baby girl it’s your heart the needs surgery. 

Performance is the name of the game, so when you stopped delivering he went and found bigger fish to fry. Now you’re on Facebook blasting the other woman’s wall but you’re fighting the wrong person! Don’t you see that love is measured in action and not words. So when he says that he loves you but acts as if you are less valuable than the gum on the bottom of his shoe you need to reconsider. Say no more. No more sitting up at night waiting for him to stumble through the door. No more tearing down of your self-esteem with his words. No more rejection when all you needed was a hug. No more belittling when all you needed was encouragement. No more tears when all you long for is laughter.

It is not a figment of your imagination.
It is not out of your reach
It is not just for some people
No, you’re not reaching for the stars
No, they aren’t all the same
No, this is not all there is to it

You do deserve love. And you deserve it in its purest form. Because in your eyes someone is going to see the beauty that lives inside. In your personality someone is going to find their best friend. In your struggles someone is going to see a warrior. And in your efforts someone is going to see that you care. 

So lift up your head, Princess. Get out of the mud, and wipe clean your crown. Your Creator wants to shower you with His love so that you will know what it is you deserve. 

 Feel free to check out my video on my Facebook page :)
https://www.facebook.com/dimpho.mathibe/videos/1345639938804206/?l=480408012848238341
I am an Occupational Therapist by profession, but I have many roles that bring meaning to my life. In short, I love people, books and love.

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