There Are Days

There are days.

There are days when it feels as if it is winter.

But it is only winter for me.

Everybody else is experiencing summer together.

They are enjoying the rays of the sun, basking in its warmth. 

There are days.

Days when coffee isn't enough to wake me up.

When chocolate no longer lifts my mood.

And music doesn't do the trick because
I can't even decide which song I want to listen to.

There are days.

Days when I wish that I could sleep for 12 hours straight,

so that I have less of the day to deal with.

So I can talk less and keep the fake smiles to a minimum. 

Days when it feels like it isn't just cold outside, but inside as well.

And when those days come.

Because they do come.

I choose to wait it out.

No use in fighting.

No use in using the little energy that I have.

So I wait.

I wait for a sunny day.

I wait for the clouds to go away.

Because trying to fight it sometimes only makes it worse.

And there's only so much that a face mask can do.

There's only so much that caffeine and sugar can do.

Those self care tips only go so far. 

Because I am much more than a face mask. 

Much more than a smile.

I am much more than my winter days,

because when my summer days come
around I try to make the most out of them. 

So that I have memories to remind me that I can have summer days.

Memories to remind me that winter doesn't last forever.