True Friendship

From a young age we all want friends. When we’re toddlers, our friends are the people we play with, the people we share our toys with. For most of us our first friends are our siblings, and our cousins. As we grow older we start looking for people we have similarities with. People we have something in common with. When we’re adults, life may separate us from those people, so we build friendships based on proximity. Friendship is something that never needed explaining. To some it may not seem as complicated as a romantic relationship. 

Brene Brown, an American scholar, author, and public speaker, says that connection is why we are here. We are hardwired to connect with others, it’s what gives purpose and meaning to our lives, and without it there is suffering. Friendship is all about connection. Let’s take an example of a great friendship from the Bible, Jonathan and David’s friendship. In 1 Samuel 18:1 it says that Jonathan loved David as much as he loved himself, so much so that he gave David his own robe, armour, sword and belt. Jonathan swore eternal friendship with David because of his deep affection for him.

In his book, Waiting and Dating, Dr Myles Munroe says that what the world calls friendship is not true friendship, because true friendship is based on love, which comes from God. He also goes on to say that most people don’t know how to be a good friend because focusing on the other person is one of the steadfast principles of friendship. But most of us always look at what we will get out of it.

Going back to our example of Jonathan and David. King Saul (Jonathan’s father) wanted David dead, but Jonathan protected David even though it meant that he would never be king if David stayed alive. Even though King Saul threw a spear at Jonathan for his words and actions he still helped David, keeping their vow of eternal friendship.

Jonathan showed us that when you make a vow of friendship to someone, you put them first. You want them to excel and receive that which they deserve. You protect them from people who persecute them, even when those people are your family members. After Jonathan had died, David honoured their friendship by giving Jonathan’s only son the land that belonged to his grandfather Saul. He welcomed him to eat at the King’s table and gave him servants to work on his land.

This week let’s examine ourselves. Who taught you how to be a friend? Are you a good friend? Do you have good friends around you? Can you trust them to take care of your children when you’re gone one day?

Let’s strive to be better in every area of our lives, especially in our friendships.


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